Gotta Be a Better Way
Given the complaining I did the other day, I figure I ought to share this link to a story that ran in today’s Inquirer, in the Health and Science section. It’s a feature piece, where you’d expect some more in-depth reporting, and for the most part the story delivers – it tells the story of a woman who’s been taking care of her paralyzed husband since he had a stroke 11 years ago, and whose own health is getting steadily worse – she’s in a wheelchair herself.
On the one hand, the story is a human interest story. On the other hand, it raises questions about our insurance and safety-net programs, our reliance on family and friends to care for the sick, and the support we provide – or don’t – to those caregivers. Those questions don’t get much exploration, but then I don’t take that as the main purpose of the piece. Still, the wonk in me wonders how we could do better.
On the third hand, I found myself wondering about the guy, and what he’s doing to try and make his wife’s burden a little easier. The story says she’s resisted putting him in a facility, even for a few days so that she could get a break, but it doesn’t mention whether he’s urged her to take a break or not. I guess, even from the human interest side, that’s one side of the dynamic I would have liked to see more about. It gets me thinking about the question of how much of a burden we can realistically ask our loved ones to take on on our behalf, and at the same time it gets me thinking that it’s important to know our own limits and ask for help every once in a while.
About Dave Thomer
Born and raised in Philadelphia. Studied philosophy at Fordham University in the Bronx, where I made many great friends and met my wonderful wife. We moved back to Philadelphia, where I studied philosophy some more and became a teacher. Online and off, I'm looking for ways that we can be better citizens and build stronger communities.