I am late to the party here, I know. The Internet chorus rendered its verdict on Green Lantern at the same time that audiences did, the former with an abundance of snark and the latter with an abundance of not-being-in-the-theater. But after 30 years as a DC fanboy, I think I have reached a breaking point, so I have some venting to do.
Plus, if we’re lucky, my brother will show up to share his thoughts, and that’s some prime entertainment value right there.
Here’s the thing about Green Lantern. They gave me just enough get-my-geek-on moments that I could imagine what an awesome Green Lantern movie would look like. And then they absolutely failed to deliver that awesome Green Lantern movie in any way. Pattie will tell you I spent two weeks before the movie came out watching and re-watching the trailers. There are about five to ten minutes where test pilot Hal Jordan is on the planet Oa, meeting aliens and making swords and shields out of green energy. DC and Warner Brothers made sure everyone say those ten minutes, because those ten minutes are pretty cool. One of the aliens is even named Tomar Re. (Tomar . . . Thomer . . . never mind.) The problem is that they forgot to save much equally-cool stuff for the actual movie. Instead, they showed an almost uncanny knack for making bad decisions at every opportunity.
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